bricks part one

yeah, God loves stones. but he hates bricks. when the alters are to be made, he says, “build em outa stone, dont use any of yer metal tools on em” .
stones are an invention of God. part of the building blocks of the universe. God used stones to build his masterpiece. you know, he created us in his image? he did. but we ate from the fruit of the tree of knowledge, and we started to remake our image like that of the tree. pisses God off. grounds for eviction. no more fruit for you! you get the bread!
then one day one of these wise guys notices that the straw from the grain, when mixed with the mud, dries really hard if you lay it in the sun, and boom! the brick was born. a new technology! a new industry! man, building cities out of stone is hard work, but look how fast it all comes together if you use the brick! the brick! look at our city! we have a better and bigger city than anyone! we must be gods!
so the technological developments begin creating a wall between man and an already distant God. then things take a really interesting turn, one genius says,”i know, lets build a tower so high, it reaches God! we will move into his neighborhood and have a lawn party! can you imagine the look on his face when the doorbell rings, and he opens the door?!”
and man got to it. surprising what men can do when the work together. using their own man made stones, held in place by petroleum byproducts, man sets about in his pursuit of God.
here is a cool thing: back then we all spoke the same language. the language God used when he communicated with adam back at the fort. anyways, when God sees what is going on, and thinks about it, although the whole idea is a little amusing to him, the intentions behind it piss him off.
“oh, you guys can make your home-made rocks, so you are better than me?”
and God throws a cosmic mcmufffin in their lunch box: he takes his language away from them. this is a pretty big deal. how do you think if you can put the pictures, impulses, and images into words? how do you contextualize anything? how can you carry on a decent conversation without all of that damned mime? its like charades, only without words; how do you know if you win?
God takes away the original language and spreads them out all over the earth, so that when they do find each other again, chances are they will be in little tribes and families, each making their own goofy noises. each group having to come to consensus about what their goofy little noises mean. how will the groups know what the other groups noises mean, and whether or not they should take offense?
this is one of the greatest setbacks in history! i mean, the flood was a drag, but at least they could talk about it! some say the original language was preserved through the line of shem, that the language was hebrew, that this was the language of God. nice for shem and his posse. but how well did that language work when the neighbors animals were doing there business on shem’s lawn?
bricks are bad news.